The last word on Trigger Warnings

Excuse the lack of blog activity, but a new tranche of my Pratchett hardback collection arrives next week and I’m busy catching up on my re-reading of the last batch. Yes, like with my ‘Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy’ collection I can almost quote them all off by heart, but it’s not the same as having the real paper and board thing in your hands. Seeing the same old gags and laughing at them in the same old way. It never gets old. I’m just saddened that he will write no more.

As a matter of interest, I always reckon Terry only ever had one real competitor in comic fantasy, Tom Holt, who has written books like the very funny ‘Expecting someone taller’. I recommend him to anyone capable of appreciating fantasy humour.

Trigger warningAnyway, I was watching a few YouTube videos about so-called ‘trigger warnings’ being used to suppress the opinions of others, and the following thought sprang to mind; all these people who complain about microagressions and all that jazz, what’s it all about? In the spirit of enquiry, I did a little reading through some serious scholarly texts on Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, and found out where the whole ‘trigger warnings’ meme originated. Well, chums, here’s the skinny; if you don’t have post traumatic stress disorder or an associated debilitation, ‘trigger warnings’ are imaginary. Yup; you got it, only a person suffering from a genuine traumatic mental stress disorder needs ‘trigger warnings’. Anyone else is bullshitting worse than a herd of pedigree Charolais Steers with the trots. Or should that be Bullock shitting, as you can’t really say that Cows, Heifers or Steers are non-castrated male bovines? A.k.a. Bulls. Therefore the excreta of uncastrated male cattle cannot justifiably be called ‘bullshit’, but I digress.

In other words, if someone who has not suffered severe mental trauma claims that a text or speech needs to be suppressed because it causes them some vague personal mental discomfort – they are, by their own admission, suffering from a mental dysfunction and in need of treatment. In which case they should be gently led away into a quiet room where they don’t have to see or hear anything that might upset them. Can’t stand the text? Maybe it’s time to get out of the classroom.

Perhaps these non-PTSD types would be happier if their Interweb and TV access were cut off so the poor darlings wouldn’t have to look at anything upsetting? Perhaps a small room with soft walls might be more their speed? Maybe a private walled garden full of nice trees fluffy squirrels and cute kittens, puppies and lovely songbirds to soothe their untrammelled but strangely troubled souls? Oh. Hang on a minute, that wouldn’t work as the kittens would chase the lovely songbirds and cute squirrels and leave claw marks in the trees after digging up the flower beds and crapping amongst all the lovely flowers while the puppies chewed at anything capable of being masticated, barked at the kittens chasing the birds and killing the mice, frogs, trees and flowers so that the peace of the garden would be so terribly stressful that the afflicted would have to hide their faces and plug their ears and noses. Just so they wouldn’t be ‘triggered’ by anything they saw, heard or smelled? It might rain. The sun might burn their skin. The sun might not shine and they’d get really depressed by all the grey skies. Never mind the hay fever and being eaten, bitten and stung by all the insects. OMG! Was that a spider! Gardens are so STRESSFUL!

Ah. Yes. Not such a fantastic idea after all. On the other hand, perhaps a little growing up on their part might be in order? In the words of the late, great St Terence of the Pratchett; it’s a million to one chance, but it might just work.

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